imploding or plain self destruction?

I have been reading and commenting in another's blog, the person is having an apparent struggle with memories of an affair they had.

When I used to be an active first-aider, one of the first things we were taught is "move the patient from the danger, or move the danger from the patient" . To a point they have done this physically they changed jobs, the other party being a worker at that place. However mentally they are still there, they by their own statements dwell on it day and night.

I know they have other issues to deal with but that's the main stumbling block as I see it. They say their wife hates them, I don't think she hates him per se, I think she hates the guy he has become, or is becoming.

Change is hard and forgiveness even harder, but without a deliberate and concerted effort together the other woman out of ones mind and a total and unreserved forgiveness from both parties in this marriage, I cannot see it going anywhere but down.

We in our marriage have had our ups and downs too, we have come close to breaking up on a couple of occasions due to various issues, but we survived them and in the surviving grew stronger together.

I know the required change is gonna be painful, almost like major surgery without an anesthetic, but it must be done if there is to be a chance for survival here.

Otherwise all I can see is an implosion.

friendships never last for ever

I haven't posted much in this journal recently, reserving it for more serious thoughts than the usual useless drivel and banter I post in my "normal" blog.

But I think a lot. Mainly thoughts I keep to myself, like why do apparent friends suddenly stop being so? I am guilty of that also so I am not pointing fingers at any one in particular. We, my wife and I had a joint friendship with another couple that had gone on for years, and suddenly it stopped. we stopped phoning each other, or calling on each other, no particular reason except they moved house a couple of times and because of rising land prices have moved forther and further away from the city.

I wonder, did we or they just get bored or lazy? I know of at least one other blogger that feels that way about another they have been friends with for years, then suddenly silence.